Stop Workplace Drama The BookI recently got a message from an associate of mine on Linked In.  The message excited me because it gave me a chance to talk why my book Stop Workplace Drama is not just about women cat-fighting in the office.  Stop Workplace Drama is even for men.  It’s also for leaders and owners who work in a collaborative environment.  Here’s what my shows up in my “in box” this morning:

 “Could this book be for me? It is 4:41 am and up because of a “worry” dream and I can’t fall back to sleep.  I’m concerned about others and their feelings, even though it is out of my control. I had pigeon-holed your book into thinking Stop Workplace Drama was more about “cat” fights or drama fights and bickering in the office. 

 Since we don’t see those in our 8 employee office at all I didn’t think this book was relative to me. Now after reading an article in the Good News Network about your book,  it seems to have more relevance as it appears to be more about “my thinking” and how I cope or handle certain situations when there is competing intentions in play. “

 Here’s a guy who really gets it. Read on to see what drama really is, the new language I created to describe it, and ten more manifestations of drama, (besides the female cat fight.)

 In Stop Workplace Drama I created a new language for drama, that I call “The language of the island.” You’ll have to get the book because it would take too long for me to explain it here.  Or you can click here and get an overview.

I also created a new definition so that when we talk about drama it’s not just about hysterionics by a bunch of women who have no self-esteem and no discipline.

 Most of us have a preconceived idea about what drama is, and that is why I had to create a whole new meaning. There are those who say, “I don’t do drama, and then on the other end are those who say, I have a lot of women working for me, so we have lots of drama.”

The definition for drama is: Any obstacle to your peace or prosperity. 

 Any obstacle.

 Doesn’t matter what the obstacle is. If the obstacle stands in the way of your peace or prosperit, it’s drama.

 Yes, the obstacle can be other people. The co-worker who rubs you the wrong way.  The Queen Bee in the office, the bully, the bad boss, or the slacker. The fact is, lack of engagement, poor business communications, absenteeism, and turnover are off shoots of some sort of drama.

 The obstacle can be outside forces, for example the new technology that forces change in your office or the new law that is a threat to your operation.

 The obstacle can even be internal. You are so shy you can’t give a presentation. Your self-esteem is so low you can’t force yourself to go to the chamber networking event.  You keep obsessing about your finances, your health or your relationships.

 When your peace is threatened, it threatens your prosperity.  Think about how drama due to a rude boss, leads to  a negative communication climate, absenteeism, presenteeism, and turnover. 

 So now you know that drama is just a part of life and workplace drama is not due to women having cat fights, although that can be one way drama manifests.

Off the top of my head, I can think up ten  more manifestations of drama that might show up even when there is no cat fight, no verbal abuse, and no female employees.

1. Obsessive worry

2. Guilt about the past

3. Avoiding a difficult conversation

4. Fear of not measuring up

5. Burning resentment

6. Game playing

7.  Saying “yes” when you want to say “no”

8.  Making a commitment you can’t keep

9.  Overwhelm

10. Denial

Stop Workplace Drama is as much about the inner game as it is about communication skills, and the outer measures and methods of business success.

 The reason there will always be drama is because with growth and change thre will always be obstacles.  The important distinction is “the” drama versus “your” drama.  The drama happens. The drama is the circumstance…the obstacle we have been talking about. 

 Your drama is how you experience and deal with the obstacle. Do you feel capable to navigate around the obstacle, or do you freak out?  It’s not about getting enough will power to respond appropriately, although that can be a temporary fix. Stop Workplace Drama is about changing your experience so that reacting appropriately is just what comes out of you. It’s about leading from clarity and intention and getting back to peace as quickly as humanly possible even in the midst of rapid change.

 No peace eventually leads to no prosperity.  No prosperity, also leads to no peace.  Peace and prosperity goes hand in hand.